The Orange Shirt Drug Blogs

Trust and respect

Deeper introspection of being asked to go away with little hope of survival

Instagram is dealing

I’m so confused. My user was banned for showing drug use and yet these ads are taking up more than 50% of my feed these days

Avoiding depression

A sadness post I will acknowledge then ignore

I see it sometimes more than other times

Risky airport story that ended well. No worry needed.

Stupid Crush Mode

A song about a girl I had a high crush on.

The leaving worry trumps the arriving

Spontaneous unscheduled all-nighter working on the web after a few days of low motivation

Formula 51

If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you.

The decision of choice

Justification post describing the mental struggle as if it’s a good thing.

I miss you… And you and you

Not a happy start to the day, and you can feel more negative thoughts are to come.

I think I was actually staying off drugs almost a month this time and so there's a bit of an adjustment. When you come back cuz they haven't been very productive and I haven't been overly happy and while I was off the drugs I was told we kind of like you to leave as soon as possible. That's a...

Deep Jack Handy Thoughts

THIS IS MY LIFE. I think useless thoughts that go nowhere and have no conclusion.

I wish I could keep trying and failing

I want to be fucked more than anything, but the terror I experience projecting my failure spoils the mood through seven stages of grief.

Successful ignorance and avoidance ended tonight

A perspective shift can often make a huge difference. After I shared this I realized my flirting misunderstand and Subway explanation may have made me look even more like an idiot.

Mid June update

No drugs. Good memories.

Lots of drafts

Filler blog. Nothing new.

The down streak

In keeping with lights pattern of having bad things happen when you're in a bad mood and multiple bad things happening in threes or in groups, this isn't a great Monday. It seems my server has upgraded websites to a newer PHP that isn't compatible with all the plugins I use so that's one thing....

Week two. Burnt buzzes

Taking a break but not quitting.

After this break

After a break

They’re laughing at me, aren’t they?

Fuck. Realization.

Another day outside Paradise

Recap of my horrid morning.

September Cloud Blowing

The party life sync problem.

Very high on k at the end. More updates later.

Problem stacking

Life. Don’t talk to me about life.

How well do I know people

Good morning blog about how my brain creates a decision making process about everything. I have to choose to trust blindly and it gets harder every year

Wow. Two masking dudes

A brain to gboard unedited script here, but if luck hits it right a different version will magically start an income for something I want to give away

Is the wall breaking?

A shit post about shit.

Wednesday all night

Wednesday all day and all night.

Terrifying but ignorable guilt

Another problem I ignore hoping will go away.

Holiday Monday Amped Am

I am super amped up this morning believing this blog is great.

I’m not used to being busy

I started writing about something else and just rambled.

Offline ramble. Distractions and Excuses

Why I don’t like to finish what I’ve started.

I wish I knew more, but I do. Perspective

A quick unintended ramble about being secretly smarter than you.

I admit it. I’m brain blocked

I distraction blog written when I’m supposed to be doing something else about distractions when I’m supposed to be doing something else.

When the meds aren’t working

The circle of dehydrated solid bulky poo.

My fantasy. Who, me?

I just got a reply on Reddit to an attempt at flirting that made me remember how bad I am at flirting

I’m out. January edition

The repeating return of being out and restocking my current drug of choice, and chocolate.

I passed worry and fear weeks ago

It’s funny to think that there’s such a thing as bad math which would imply that there’s good meth and there is but it ain’t what I’ve got today

Accidental Meth Addiction Q&A

I cannot decide if this was a good reply or not, but meth says it’s a great example of meth addiction so I posted it feeling confident.

Decision Time. 2:34am

A 3am blog about what happens next. 4am, 5am. Are we set for a new music release, or work?

I listened to one of the early AI podcasts

A spontaneous life evaluation post. The kind I often have in January. Reflect on things I’m not planning on changing

The ewww but do it anyway ritual

The life of a drug user.

A weird place to be in my brain

Hard drug choices. Drugs are bad, but bad drugs are worse.

I won’t try this again, probably

Bait and switch before I knew it.

Sleepover

Deep bleh thoughts

No Smoke. No Snack Tuesday

Part of an unbalanced break – fast. Literally fasting through a break… Maybe.

Morning necessities

I’m out again. This or soon will be.

Sudden irrational fear… But maybe

Oh no. I’m out again

Hair ,-The nightmare.

A deep and personal blog written as soon as I woke up today. Life perspective.

Really bad Jeff day

That time I built on hard work.

spun spun spun… All night song

Original song and music video edit

Things I notice occasionally

A mid day pondering.

My legacy is self ruining

That escalated quickly. A 5am confessional.

Six false starts.

The secret blog revealed. Warning. Not for the faint of heart.

I picked up my phone for this

The most important blog I didn’t write.

Autistic User Manual

Late night blog post that should have been longer but I lost the energy halfway through. The original idea was I wanted to talk about the concept of creating a user manual for autistic people and their friends and family.

Six two

Today is a good day. Why write it any other day?

Thursday Review.

Good and bad moments, but a good day starts with bank deposits.

A day of sucking

A lot of things have not gone well today and I'm always fascinated by these kind of unrelated minor problems that seem to happen when I'm in a bad mood. I've always said; good things happen when you're in a good mood and bad things happen when you're in a bad mood. I never really thought much...

The return of doubt

When I'm low on my drug, I ration the doses so I don't have to go without any at all. It's probably not a good plan but to some extent it does give me a small amount each day instead of going cold turkey until I have a car and funds at the same time, and can go restock. The problem happens that I...

October Nights, Dreams and Mornings.

October is the best. Deep sleep hard mornings and orange chocolate.

Morning blog choice

I don’t know how to describe this blog. New rut is disturbing.

Thanksgiving dinner

A blog it doesn’t mention Thanksgiving dinner and then an unrelated music video that I wrote today about coming clean and admitting my drug habit so that I can share this blog with more people. Hidden away in an unrelated post so that I have an out when I don’t do that.

My first liver spot!

A story about life’s mood swings and wasted worry.

Thursday of the week alone

I've been alone since Tuesday, taking care of the house and the animals, and I've done an OK job. It's not particularly difficult, it's just more than usual, remembering times and paying attention to the distress barks if there are any. And today I woke up i've been getting up a little bit earlier...

Graffiti the Wall