I can see why people use ketamine in therapy because it’s 3:00 p.m. on Sunday now and I haven’t slept but I had a fantastic mood day. That’s a day when you feel like it’s a fantastic day even though you don’t actually get much done you just feel like it’s all good.
It was all good. It still is but I’m getting tired just as I have to go and see the animals for my second shift. It was a beautiful day which helped. Everything felt right and I got a lot of video production and other stuff done. I spent a little bit more money than I expected to getting my auto editing clip software renewed. It’s the software that allows me to record long form and have it add captions closed captions and edit into smaller clips that can be played on tick tock and YouTube shorts.
Despite how often I say I don’t want to be famous and I just want a few fans, I have to admit that getting a few fans is exhilarating and a little bit addictive. I still observe the rest of the world and see how people will do just about anything for more likes and followers and I don’t want to be about that. I’m having fun creating content under the false assumption that people care and will watch but not a lot of people because everything changes
I like being able to read my comments and mock people who are odd or foolish and reply to those who are sincere. I frequently wish the people I follow were still connected to their followers and replied to their comments but most don’t anymore. It’s understandable. The small amount of video work that I do can take up a good portion of my day and I’m not trying.
The moment it becomes more important is the day I have to actually start doing work. Effort. Right now it’s still fun and I have the freedom to not do it tomorrow or the next day if my mood dips. I can’t deny that having more money would be nice. I’d like enough to be able to give away to others either in paying for content and support or just paying for friendship. I like being generous and it’s much harder when you’re poor.
My life has never been motivated by money. I tell customers that and they tell me that’s a bad thing to tell them. That’s why they’re my customers because they tell me I’m worth more instead of accepting the deal I like being a nice guy
I don’t like being yelled at and so I’m trying not to do things that would make people yell at me. It’s not hard once you start doing it. It shocks me sometimes how other people don’t.
In any case my energy is waning. I had a good day but it’s 3:00 p.m. now I’m ready for it to be over.
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