Second Life

Second Life is an alternative online universe where people are free to create whatever environments where they live and work. Posts in this category mention Second Life in some way although the entire pot may not always be about my Second life character.

Second Life

Second Life is an alternative online universe where people are free to create whatever environments where they live and work. Posts in this category mention Second Life in some way although the entire pot may not always be about my Second life character.

Second Life Gallery

Second Life Gallery

This is a gallery of some of my favorite pictures from the alternate universe known as Second Life. The original metaverse [gallery type='flickr' view='photos' user_id='64251869@N00' tag_mode='any' count='16' more='more Photos' title_position='none' caption='none'...

The Conversation Room

The Conversation Room

You see an online virtual mall filled with flashy storefronts and top notch animated advertisements everywhere. You walk down the pathway in awe at how many options there are to spend money on a seperate universe. You see a new store is opening up where the old bookstore used to be. The Conversation Room doors open soon. Nobody knew what it was. There were guesses and bar bets placed. They were...

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501L

501L

I foolishly thought all bus stops were equal on the Queen West line, so I missed the earlier one, but Google maps says I should still arrive before 10 I'm on it now, and it is cool and bright and I found a seat although I'm conscious about still being a bit smelly. I'm still wearing the same jeans (unwashed) and orange hoodie. That is one of several ways I am u prepared for day 1. My hair and...

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Day T-1

Day T-1

Today is Sunday. My practice day to see that I can wake up and get things done. I won't say I'm failing already, but it certainly wasn't a totally slow start. It's 10:30 and I feel like I will tackle my to-do list today out in the sun and feel better about it. I am thankful for the sun I'm about a quarter through the second Pizza hut pizza that I bought and ate last night. I am thankful for the...

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The Next Episode

The Next Episode

In the past. I have always talked about each new move as a Chapter in my life story. I learn so many new things when I'm living in the house with other people. Now I think it might be time to modernize my terminology since so much about how we share our story is now multi media. I don't write chapters. I record 15 second updates, and old people complain about how fast the world is moving these...

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Wild by my standards

Wild by my standards

It's 6am and even though I asked and she said no, when 8 asked again, I ended up changing her plans and spending the whole night talking. It's what I wanted and I get high enough to believe it's enjoyable. I know interaction with high women who I click with is the most fun I have, and indream of how we could work to be a success. Later in life, I learned that's a weed stoner thing. If nobody...

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I almost cried when my doctor called.

I almost cried when my doctor called.

I'm near tears right now, but managing. I had high hopes for a call from my doctor. I had plans of what to say. 45 seconds later, we were saying goodbye and I said nothing. I hate that. I hate myself right now. I accomplished nothing. I didn't get anything I was going to ask for. Things I need. I froze. I knew I was doing it and instead of speaking up I just said yes and no and thank you and...

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Oh yeah… It’s Friday already

Oh yeah… It’s Friday already

It's not like there is any real significance to weekends when you're at home 24/7. I still honour our cultural traditions and not get high till Friday. But I got high not remembering it was Friday. This week went by fast for me because I have important work, and I've blocked it mentally and put it off till they ask a second time A joke from Coming to America I repearmt frequently, but I'm high...

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Am I the same person

Am I the same person

People say drugs change you. Your whole personality changes because of addiction. I understand that statement, and a self evaluation is hard, but I can certainly think about a few ways I've changed. I can imagine my close friends might notice even more changes. I had a hard time adapting to living alone. I look different. I lost a lot of face weight along with body weight. Two belt sizes or...

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The morning mental debate

The morning mental debate

Over the years I have created a number of different tricks to start my day better. I know what I need to do to wake up and start being productive. As soon as I realize I'm up, I turn on all the lights to full brightness and stand up and stretch. The key is to not go back to bed right away. This of course doesn't work if you don't want to wake up and start your day. You have to beat the urge to...

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I do pretty good at not regretting

I do pretty good at not regretting

I have formed my belief that I live very much in the now. I am paying attention to my surroundings and being self aware. When I do something .. anything really, the thought has been vetted. I have thought up the consequences in so many ways. I understand now how smokers must feel. People don't want to pass up pleasure, or just distraction. My life may be complicated because of my drug use, and I...

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Let me scooch right by

Let me scooch right by

This is a blog that's going to start off talking about the loud noises going on right now at 8:00 p.m. on Monday. The decision to make this blog about that topic was decided upon spontaneously as I was writing the subject title of this blog. The title of this blog refers to the second topic I was going to make this blog about. Weed flipflops every time. I gain a lot of better life observations...

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The virtual life future.

The virtual life future.

One of my unfinished projects was to write a fiction. A short story or a novel if I felt up to it. In my mind it made a good TV series and I could be a millionaire if I only told someone about it. I have two chapters and I might be inspired to write more now and then but the topic of this blog isn't that. It's about second life. I think it's getting a raw deal because no one seems to be...

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Flip Flopping isn’t a bad thing.

Flip Flopping isn’t a bad thing.

I have do much to share but let's see what gets retained long enough for the blog. I flip flop a lot. Often several times a minute as I internally debate decisions. If I stall long enough somebody else will make it. My phyciatrist has a standard procedure of always asking if I have sicicidal thoughts or self harm. I modified my stock answer. I'm actually enjoying the story. I'm having fun still....

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Old man behavior

Old man behavior

I was going to start this vlog with the game, second life. That was my whole opening line. Second life. It occurred to me that that's the kind of thing old men probably old women at some point start to yell out random words like that. This could even be what some forms of tourettes are. Old people frequently take their time in remembering things. I have SVA and another vlog on that point. I talk...

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Experiments in Blogging.

Experiments in Blogging.

My plan is to be recording by audio, and there's this important to all that. Okay. Water, oops, live brain transcript, Canadian Thanksgiving October 11 2021 Coming up day drinks water. So the story so far. I just got high. And it's, it was at 420, in the afternoon on a holiday Monday. The plan is to not do that again tonight, but just turn on the blog mode. And, oh, so much later, I get the...

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You don’t suck.

You don’t suck.

Mental Profile As I was laying in bed tonight I realized this needed to be written. I couldn't go to sleep without waking up and writing down this latest idea of mine. The world has recently adopted the term mental health to include all of those who have some difference from the norm. It may be referred to as a disorder or it may be an illness, or it may be a deficit. Whatever the case they...

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It’s October now.

It’s October now.

I got distracted on my way to writing this blog because it's 10:35 on the first Saturday of October and it occurs to me that I will probably be up at least another hour and could watch Saturday night live season premiere live for the first time in 2 years at least. That's not significant to my friends at all I'm the only one that has been a loyal viewer of Saturday night Live since the second...

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Starting at 5pm

Starting at 5pm

It's Wednesday of the week back work week and as of 5pm, I've done nothing. I had a glorious uninterrupted restorative sleep last night during a thunderstorm. I woke up at 730 and then went back untill about 1045. Since then I've just sat around playing on my phone doing almost nothing. The closest I've come to working was to try an email task promising it would be done sometime today. It is a...

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Live Brain Transcript

Live Brain Transcript

I'm giving this one a second try. At the very least, you know, isn't quite as distracting. But I'm very easily distracted. I mean, something took me away from pizza. Not right don't go on camera when they're eating pizza. doesn't seem right for the day Really is fantastic green screen So, executives Tell me I've got to have a web page that doesn't work for me because I've got to make the...

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I could be President.

I could be President.

They have a saying that anyone could be president and some people laugh that off. But the truth is, anyone probably can become president. If managed by smart people. All you need to do is be some people's favorite. And they'll bulk that in and buy everything you're selling. Trump is the first president to openly flaunt the knowledge that if they like you, they want to trust that your version of...

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Live Brain Transcript

Live Brain Transcript

0:04 I absolutely hate when one single click. Takes me so far away from what I was doing that sometimes I don't make it back. Period. Tonight was therapy. I shared who I am, with someone seeking approval that I'm just interesting enough to want to see more, period. I have a bad habit of telling opinions, as if they were fact. 0:51 But I always try to correct that if I noticed tonight. I talked...

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High Tea on Tuesday

High Tea on Tuesday

Have u mentioned the rock bottom practice of burning the brown spots off my collection of pipes. I don't clean, I conserve. I deckareto my usual tea party friends I was out and would be for a while. Zeppelin. I can hear my heartbeat kind of like a hirserace. I reach for my heartbeat watch Blimp my head made a bell sound when I hit the wall just now. WeirdIt was the hard drive updating the cloud....

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The mental beuracracy of two Jeffs

The mental beuracracy of two Jeffs

Imagine for a moment what it might be like to have a disconnect in your brain that spontaneously allowed for a second awareness. A second consciousness that remains seperate from your normal everyday life. For me, I am starting to figure out that my stoned consciousness doesn't share or retain memories of it's time controlling my brain. My high mind has figured this out and is still in the...

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Make me a thousandaire

Make me a thousandaire

Idea. I would like to make $2000 a monh and not much more. I want to create a site to win the market. A site that is not on;y free, but BETTER than all those crap sites that don'y actually have real people or elegable.   Site Idea:  social network Craigslist JUST for Toronto. Craigslist style personals lists in several categories. Personal ads or even personals pages and blogs. A social...

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Dead Vera won some money

Dead Vera won some money

  Disclaimer. As of November 14th when I wrote this, Vera Macdonald was alone and thriving on Facebook. The Vera I refer to in this blog is a fake Romanian Vera Macdonald, trying to get me to pay for my winnings. Conversation Information Vera Macdonald     WED 4:52 AM New User Created with stolen pic. I know its the scam even before the first message. Everything below is a fiction I created...

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I see it now. I’m already in the pit

I see it now. I’m already in the pit

Previously I had found the polar opinions about meth usage on Tumblr an interesting mix. Many of the people were declaring their love for the drug, posting pictures and memes of their enjoyment and love  others were posting negative imagery, often declaring they wanted to die I think I may have crossed that line this weekend. I get it. Meth is good. It's quitting it that is bad, and then you do...

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The Friday Grab

The Friday Grab

Although I enjoy the drug chat rooms, they are probably bad for me. They keep me active and wanting to be high more, to belong and avoid any suspicion that I project on them. I'm not typical so I feel I might be feared as an under over. I say stupid things sometimes. Frequently When I'm not saying something stupid I'm sayi g things that make sense to be, bit when interpreted by the audience of...

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Having fun on the way down

Having fun on the way down

I'm enjoying life despite the empenfing doom. I'm having fun. Making friends and being me. Awkward and odd in all my glory. I'm saying dumb sjit and apologizing and nobody seems to hate me. They forgive and move on. Ironically these new friends are all from a community I should be avoiding. The drug user community. Stoners I never really had many stoner friends, despite being pretty active user...

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This is where I’m honest, right

This is where I’m honest, right

I'd like to think I could be honest again, because I think I'm worth a second look. I only feel this is true. When I'm high. I did a huge thing today. I just did it. I got high on a drug that isn't weed. Let me lead into that. I have a story. I'm an interesting thinker but drugs enabled me to think I could live without people. I became my worst enemy... Alone Jeff. I only react. I have modeled...

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The Grab I can’t Afford

The Grab I can’t Afford

Sometimes I amaze myself with what I'm willing to do to appease others. In this case, it's as much appeasing myself I suppose. I'm mixing up emotions in my head. This week I happened to acquire $100 in cash. This is money that rightfully should be dedicated to paying down my overdraft and covering bills. More specifically, this money was given to pay half of my monthly car insurance bill. It's...

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The Grab I can’t affford

The Grab I can’t affford

Sometimes I amaze myself with what I'm willing to do to appease others. In this case, it's as much appeasing myself I suppose. I'm mici g up emotions in my head. This week I happened to acquire $100 in cash. This is money that rightfully should be dedicated to paying down my overdraft and covering bills. More specifically, this money was given to pay half of my monthly car insurance bill. It's...

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So I’m supposed tobe honest here, right?

So I’m supposed tobe honest here, right?

I'd like to think I could be honest again, because I think I'm worth a second look. I only feel this is true. When I'm high. I did a huge thing today. I just did it. I got high on a drug that isn't weed. Let me lead into that. I have a story. I'm an interesting thinker but drugs enabled me to think I could live without people. I became my worst enemy... Alone Jeff. I only react. I have modeled...

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#torontodrugs

#torontodrugs

COMMUNITY BASED BROADCAST STUDIO#torontodrugs#canadadrugsDreams that actually came true.FROGSTAR.TV is part of the Frogstar family of related sites.KIK chat group website #torontodrugs#canadadrugs Access to this website from Canada only. This page was created to introduce a the idea of a blog that can be shared by thge people of the KiK chat groups #drugstoronto and #drugscanada If you would...

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The Important Friday.

The Important Friday.

It turns out we do thank God it's Friday. Old English Frīgedæg ‘day of Frigga’, named after the Germanic goddess Frigga, wife of the supreme god Odin and goddess of married love; translation of late Latin Veneris dies ‘day of Venus’, Frigga being equated with the Roman goddess of love, Venus. Compare with Dutch vrijdag and German Freitag. In therapy, we discussed that I need to work harder to...

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Last of the bad.

Last of the bad.

I finished it. Back to normal. Normal-ish. Today was a good day, despite a constant upping. A lot. It's 8pm and I am high on weed, I feel tired but my heart is racing. I did a lot on two weeks. I'm hoping my math is wrong and it was three weeks. In truth I've been bringing on drugs for a while.   A long binge. It will be tough to quit and a while to recover and be as good as it was in June....

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I was doing so well.

I was doing so well.

There is a moment in the life of any substance users life, when they remember a better life.  No. I already changed my mind. I won't speak for them. I am always comparing myself in a quest to be more normal. It leaves me in a never-ending quest to change. My role model is absolutely everyone else. I think that may be more common than... Change. I can speak for me. I have a loop. A save point in...

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Live Brain Transcript

Surprise. We had to wake you 230 years too early.

About 10 years ago, I signed the card that came with my driver's licence, allowing my organs to be donated when I die. I couldn't see any good reason not to because no matter what the after life turns out to be, I'm certain it won't be filled with the few hundred people who cryogenically froze their remains. I was sent a follow up card from the government recnetly asking a couple of additional...

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That moment when your brain remembers the truth, not the lie

That moment when your brain remembers the truth, not the lie

I convinced myself a little meth might allow me a Bing and productive weekend, but the truth is, my regular drug free life now is very happy and productive. More than it ever has been. My little meth turned into a full on binge Thursday. Finally fell asleep Sunday at 6pm with the help of a sleep aid. It's Monday today and I'm in full hangover mode, so naturally I boosted to be ready for a...

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I remember the moment I invented Heaven

I remember the moment I invented Heaven

Was today. I've been there. I've even worked there. Fell in love and creayyedca home life for myself, which I ruined. I've learned a lot. You're dead now. Stop talking about the universe and create it. Some people rollplay the had memories and some will make new memories. I am a universe. A finite universe 100% created by the experiences gathered from my senses since month 4. Movie. Starts...

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Day 1. Orientation.

Day 1. Orientation.

I heard a distinct Bing sound and that was the first time I was aware of anything.  Everything was black and I couldn't really feel inside myself. It's a hard to describe a concept unknown to anyone. If a blind person asked you what blue was you would describe things that were blue, which would be useless. I just was. A thought hearing a ding. Attention. Attention. I'm Doctor Phillips and I have...

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The Grab I can’t Afford

The Wednesday of anxity and bad choices.

  I'll see how far I get. Hi. I'm orange Jeff. It's a Wednesday and I've snorted enough meth to keep me up till who knows when if I really pushed it. It's an old story, I told over a year and a half ago. My problem is the story is from this week. Twho days before I have to be a weekend employee of respect at a convention where I work the info desk. I am predicting a fail at this point, with...

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Free Million Dollar Ideas

Free Million Dollar Ideas

https://photos.app.goo.gl/WLgSBp6AYKHF5JQ47 I am already thinking I might not share this, but 15 seconds ago, I was pumped. I was going to give away some of my million dollar ideas, and I use that number to show how old I am. Any good idea is worth more than millions to the right person. For people willing to start a business withthe knowldge to be a success, could be. In other words, there are...

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Genius idea.

Genius idea.

I think I'm ready to go home now. Before the literal fireworks might begin. I don't want to be carrying a tray full of beers when those bangs take me off guard.   The above two sentences were here when I opened up the blog. They're from Sunday.   Tonight I wanted to blog an idea for an app.  A lot of other social media share apps use the word story to create a blog... Oh wait   ...

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Pausenblog

Pausenblog

Pausenblog. A german word I just made up that translates to, blogging during the show. Live on webcam and streaming... not streaming tonight, because I can't figure the best place. I am watching the brand new MURDER MYSTERY, and I absolutly love it.    37:28 The second person is murdered, which makes it almost a game. I understand lonliness more when watching fun shows alone, because they...

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Tuesday Transit Talk

Tuesday Transit Talk

I didn't blog from my subway ride for a couple of trips because my timing was off and the ride was busy. Toronto transit is great but it's better when you're not riding at the same time as all the other passengers. School rush hour is earlier than business rush hour and retail rush hour. I don't know if they staggered it for transit on purpose or for other logistical reasons but it creates a...

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It’s right there… My future.

It’s right there… My future.

I'm feeling great. I've still got a few issues, but the drug changes have settled.  Ironically, I just got a call that I can order from a third option. Good old Apotex, which is the biggest Canadian generic drug manufactuer. I still liked the first generic brand, but hated the second. This brand has two side effects. (1) It's time release is more gradual, which is probably better, but I got used...

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Fake Monday blog

Fake Monday blog

I've been blogging on my bus and subway rides as a good way to work out my feelings and mindset in between therapy.  It's helpful, and I recommend it, even if you don't really tell anybody about the blogs. They can still be therapeutic. It's the new socially acceptable way to talk to yourself. I enjoy watching people on the subway, but after the first initial glances, staring can become awkward....

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The Caretaker

The Caretaker

Chapter one. Once upon a time. In a small town just north of Thunder Bay there was an old fairy tale that has been told for generations about the story of the town's clocktower. It stood at the base of the main street and was older than photography so nobody really knows. Experts have studied its architecture but it remains unique in this world. Its most unusual feature is that instead of having...

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#torontodrugs

Subway Blogging. I did a thing.

It's a Friday before what is now called memorial day weekend, although I remember when it was Victoria Day and many people in Canada call it may 2-4 weekend presumably because one year it fell on the 24th and a beer company ran commercials. We Canadians love our beer in 24 can cases. At least I think we do. I only tried beer once.   Today I started a thing. I'll see if I can maintain it. I...

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Blogging Live in Two universes.

Blogging Live in Two universes.

Life Stream BloggingThis is a first. I am live streaming my blog in two universes simultaneously.  I have spent the time since 4:20 today setting this up. It took a little while extra because I toked on my new wax vaporizer pen. I still say it should have a U in Canada but it seems they don't want to create two boxes. Then I set out in my new Pot Bar in the alternate universe known as Second...

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Simulcast

Simulcast

I'm just the right amount of the high to blog, and 9:36pm on a Thursday. I am doing my best not to panic, and not to freak out, because I feel a failure cominhg on, and I'm not sure what to do about it. Noteable this week. Phyciatrist on Monday. Weird. Not easy. Unfocused and starting over, biut still good. Still value. Still nopt guilty enough to quit. I am almost a hermit man and almost a...

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Opening Night at the Pot Bar

Blogged Live from the alternate Universe

I have blogged a lot in the past, and sometime as the chatcater Orange Jeff, but more recently, while a big high, I decided it might be novel to have Orange Jeff blog from within this Universe. I am literally typing this as ... Oh now I've ruined it all. I'm streaming live to YouTube although I forget whether I set it to be viewiable or not. I was pondering the other day, which of my business...

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A slice of life.

A slice of life.

Each time I say I feel close... like this could be the one that works. The one that happens. Each time, I wake up the next day like it never happened. Each time, I do get closer, but a think slice of progress, almost impossible to notice. Except on weed. Every day, I create a new onsticle to that progress and crushes my joy by whatever means possible to lessen my confidence and choice. I have no...

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Having fun on the way down

Are you doing this for me, or yourself?

Old post - Out of date sequence I'm torn between two topics to write about tonight. The four women in my life. One, currently living with me while she comes to grips with her new reality and admits she needs help. Like decison making for you kind of sick help. However, as of today, I am her caregiver, like ... wow.  I will admit what I was about to type before I stopped.  ...like a philipino....

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I just did a whole series of bad choices

I just did a whole series of bad choices

Bad me. It's been 6 minutes since I typed that, and then lay down staring up. This is the progression. Or as far as I can get.   Having insomnia issue that kept me up, despite tired. Sitting pondering.   I lay in the pretending to sleep mode but at a time in the evening, I give up. It is my way to avoid. It has been my way. Ponder 1. The weed I bought is strong indica and the new dab...

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More private blogs again.

More private blogs again.

One of the early signs I'm off the wagon is 2am blogs and 4am blogs and 6am blogs and Second Life blogs. It means I'm staying up all night. I must have gotten high. It started with 5 Molly pills. I'd been without the pressed branded pills for about 2 years. The last of the blue Rolls Royce got used and There was only Canadian powder that could be cut with brown sugar. I once spent $40 for brown...

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SL

SL

The things I have done in the alternate universe either alone, or with a companion. [useyourdrive dir="19p_ky9Ugal1s23kPzRtTF4FC9nY8HHOX" mode="gallery" viewrole="guest" downloadrole="all" ]

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A bad thing for a good reason.

A bad thing for a good reason.

I'm not sorry. I do not regret today's desision... But of course, I'd say that now, still under the influence of a euphoria I previous denied. I am euphoric and creative and excited. I have been writing all night. My normal behaviour was to take some MDMA and try to find somebody to help me with my lifelong quest. The quest for my partner. I try to go into business either with one of my top...

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Make me a thousandaire

The Orange Shirt Creative Community

My idea for the moment. Everyone needs a good community. A group of friends to share ideas and do stuff with. People who care about you and keep you distracted and fun on a lonely evening. Everyone, but specially awkward singles of any age. I propose an online community idea that could be done easily and cheaply but benefit a whole lot of people. This proposal was written on weed with...

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The Important Friday.

Pausenblog: November Greys.

It's a week and a bit since I started the new perscription from my phyciatrist. I didn't really ask for the drugs, although that was my intent for the last three years. The whole story stems from me wanting to see if amphedimine based medication would work for me, because my A.DD has gotten more noticiable since I started evaluation my life when I had to live on my own for the first time.  I...

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First Pausenblog of November.

First Pausenblog of November.

A lot has happened in my life,  and I suppose I chose to return to drugs.  Visually I was able to see this time,  how disruptive it is to my happy sober Monday to Saturday life. I have also returned to my alternate Universe where I get to be a whole new person,  and I've chosen High Jeff to be open and free about being super high both as I enter that universe,  and also Orange Jeff as I am known...

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The Chat Session Origin Story

The Chat Session Origin Story

Watch how the conversation unfolded and tell me you want to invest. The world needs community in a world where we're not interacting like we used to. Community is key to happiness. Sadness shared is halfed. Happiness shared is doubled. We have the opportunity to invent a whole new world in the Second Universe model... but NOT Second Life. EVERUYTHING in this universe can be duplicated and sold...

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37 seconds in. Pausenblog. A made up word that has a feel to it

37 seconds in. Pausenblog. A made up word that has a feel to it

37 seconds later, I drifted to qyesy, saw a zeppelin and smiled. The story I want to share is huge, but I don't mind takinmg 54 myuears to tell it.  ding memory: Always play a sport with somebody who plays better than you Jeff, or you can't learn an improve. ding. What if --- No. I'll not bring some scenarios into my narrative.  I remember a time, when I was living in an enviornmenty that had --...

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Our Dream

Our Dream

Somethig that frustrates me in this new connected world is that we can see tonnes of cool people but they're not in my city. Any future for me is digital and virtual.  I've never had great success with online friends. They last till they don't. I suppose I could look for -- I digress. Wouldn't it be cool if there were a quality luxury nightclub / dance club that everyone could go to at the same...

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Our Dream

I remember thye origin stories of the weirdest things

I remember visually where I was standing when I first heard the CBC Radio announcer describing this piece of music he was about to play. It wasn't so much music like a song, but a tone. Somebody had invented, or discovered this tone that sounded like it was rising higher and higher, forever. It was a loop that tricked our ears into thinking it was forever rising, when in reality it was just...

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