It’s weird when you have a lot of fast thoughts blowing through your brain but it’s hard to stop and write about any of them. This drug gives my a hyper focus on things that I find interesting but it’s easy to ignore things I should be doing.
Today was all about the website, and it was fun. I learned new things and worked through challenges.
Just as I’m ready to walk away and enjoy bed and TV, I crashed the site with an error, just like I did yesterday around this time.
The irony of this work is, that it’s still all for a website that openly talks about my struggles with drug use. Some would say I promote it. It has shame attached.
So I have mixed feelings. I don’t think the word would — or should be fans of a drug website. I really should be maintaining two or three seperate blogs, and yet this niche area has a better chance of a following.
I really want to blog more about my life as an adult asexual ADHD guy with a lot of issues but those conversations probably shouldn’t be here between meth Cloud blowing videos.
In a way, I may be using the obscurity of a website I don’t feel comfortable promoting so that I won’t be a failure at trying to be a success. My brain avoids things on multiple levels.
This is only the first week of usage so I’m sure my moods will go up and down over the next month or so.