It’s Sunday morning. Halloween. The last day of October. I woke up a little late that 10:00 a.m. and felt like I could go back to sleep for a rest of the day I’ve been overdoing my drug habit. Severely.

Justifying a drug habit is a weird thing that the brain of the one involved can come up with all sorts of statements that seem to make sense, especially after getting high. It’s 10:30 and I’ve made the room quite smoky at least for a few more minutes. It dissipates fast and I let myself believe the odor doesn’t linger.

I feel better than I did at 10:00 a.m. but only because I was sleepy. That’s passed for now but I figure it’s not far away. My wake to sleep ratio is still off. It looks like the weather will be gray and cold so I may not leave the room much. It’s been that way pretty much all week.

My usage at this level is less helpful. I go slightly past the attention deficit disorder benefits into the blah I don’t want to do anything mood. Except more drugs.

Even TV watching is less enjoyable. My mind can’t decide what mood I’m in.

…

It’s 6pm now and I’ve accomplished nothing. I’ve used more of the drugs today than ever. I felt nothing but blah.

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