I fear anger, and have spent my entire life avoiding it in every situation..I run from it. I hide and cry when others around me get angry.
Sadly, my poverty and mental issues have left me in a bad situation. I live in a bedroom owned by a man with a bad temper. An explosive anger that can erupt without warning at any time.
Today was an especially bad example. We live within a house along with 8 cats and two dogs. Each have the ability to frustrate or anger their owner, and frequently are responsible for the outbursts.
The four male cats live in one half the house and the four females live in the other. The males love to escape and cause havok. Today was one such day
It starts with a cat growl, then a fast and furious fight. Usually a short one as the female runs and hides.
The human then freaks out and begins a yelling spree of epic proportions. This week is a particularly emotional time and the catfight triggered emotions beyond normal for both of us.
I stay locked in my room but I can’t help but wince and cry a little as the yelling continues. He has frightened both cats and they’ve hidden deep within their secret safe spots in the walls. They cry. He cries. I cry.
Then he starts yelling and punching walls and swearing in a constant fuck loop increasing in volume and anger.
I put on my headphones but it doesn’t help.
Now he can’t find any cats and he’s worries.
The loop begins again.
I turn up my music.