The challenge of challenges

Personal Journey, work

Since I figured out a little bit more about how my brain works and what I need to be productive, it’s been a a benefit and a negative. I can use it as a crutch to not be productive simply…

The challenge of challenges

Since I figured out a little bit more about how my brain works and what I need to be productive, it’s been a a benefit and a negative. I can use it as a crutch to not be productive simply because I’m not doing one of the things that allows me to be productive, if that makes any sense.

One example is troubleshooting. It’s exciting and interesting until it’s not. This week I had two customers waiting on me and both of them had problems I wasn’t able to immediately solve, which is usually exactly what I need to keep me interested enough to keep working. A challenge is not a chore. It’s interesting and it holds that interest so that I can remain focused and keep working.

It’s an ADHD thing. The moment something interesting turns into a chore with no challenge, it becomes less interesting and it’s much easier to become distracted either intentionally or accidentally.

So a challenge is only effective to keep my mind focused until it’s either too difficult and I give up, or too easy and my mind wanders.

I’m having a challenge with a web design problem and it’s taken me 5 days instead of a few hours because I get frustrated and my mind stops working with the efficiency needed to solve problems.

I hate it. Not only do I hate not being able to solve a problem, but I hate disappointing a customer, looking bad in front of them because I can’t solve it, wasting time and anything else I can pile on to my reasons for depression.

I don’t want to talk about it.

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