Although I didn’t expect to feed the hens today, I gave them some nice food around 4:00 and it was a good assortment of three different types of food. We have several locations we feed them into keep things interesting so I fed them at the northernmost elevated location that they seem to like.
It’s a beautiful sunny day today although it started off extremely cold in my room, so I took this opportunity to go for a walk around the property which I haven’t done much this year especially compared to previous years. I stayed inside a lot this summer. Weeks went by without me leaving the house. Perhaps months. As I think of it I might not have left the house all of September.
In any case the property is always different from week to week as he walks around and rearranges things so it’s always an interesting stroll through our backyard.
At first the black hen was the only one following me which is not abnormal. She doesn’t seem to hang with the others. Soon after however the evil rooster that suffers from FOMO had to come check it out. At the time I was at the very back of the property which has only one narrow exit between the garage area and the chicken coop.
That’s where we met. Luckily I had decided to take a defensive weapon at the last minute even though I wasn’t going to be anywhere near the chickens for my stroll. It acts as a nice walking stick as well.
My favorite stick has been hidden again perhaps because I broke the rule and didn’t take it to my bedroom upstairs every time I came inside. A stupid rule but if he found the stick anywhere outside I suspect he would hide it and make me ask for it so that he could tell me I promised.
I won’t play that game this time. I spent enough time without it to know that anything works as well and I’d grown accustomed to the height of the baseball bat.
So the rooster and I brought a crossroads more or less. I wanted to walk forward and he wanted to be in my way. Just because. Not for any real reason except to show power in front of the hands. The power to block the human and show superiority.
I found it humorous that this was the very first time I realized the term cock blocking was appropriate in this case. I don’t know how I missed that one previously.
In any case we played our little game where I tap the bat and wait about 30 seconds It moves a step away. We repeat. This happens until eventually he steps forward but to the side. This is intentional I believe because it’s the pattern that he chooses whenever he’s blocking me. Eventually he moves slightly to the side so that I can proceed but I still do it one step at a time. Step, wait, step, wait.
I stumble at one point but regain my posture in enough time to avoid an attack.
Three steps later he lunges and I block.
For what I think is the first time since we started playing this game, I block with physical contact. I touch his chest as He’s coming at me. I can’t deny it felt good.
It wasn’t a swing or a violent touch. It was just enough to move him physically back slightly. The second and third touches we’re not necessary but it seemed like a good time to take advantage and be a little bit more forceful than previous attempts. I moved him back and out of the way.
He puffs up his chest and does his cock-a-doodle-doo but by that time I am walking away, keeping in constant eye contact of course, one step at a time.
I don’t turn my back on the rooster even when I’m out of range because I have learned from previous experience He’s fast and I can’t afford to be attacked in my bare ankles and bare feet.
So we had our little pointless show of aggression. It’s been over a month I suppose since he’s tried. I thought we were over it but I’ve thought that three or four times previously so I suppose this is just his way of reminding me that if you want to he could really come at me.
And if I wanted to I could treat him like a golf ball with a baseball bat. A mixed metaphor to be sure but an actual baseball bat actually swinging at the rooster like he was a golf ball isn’t really a metaphor at all.
It’s a fantasy.
One day it might be a fact.
And then a story to post to my blog. The day I flung the rooster into the next yard for someone else to worry about.
This puts a smile on my face. I know it shouldn’t but it does.
I’m tired of playing games with this rooster.
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