I had very specific plans to do something when I woke up this morning. I had worked them out while I was asleep…kind of.
I’m not sure about that limbo of almost asleep where my dreams may or may not be dreams. They might just be thoughts.
In any case, I had a task.
I woke up and sat at my computer. As I was about to click the mouse, I reconsidered. I didn’t do the task. I’m not certain why. It seems like it would have been fun, but certainly outside the actual task I e been working on every day.
A distraction. One with the potential to keep me off my main focus and start a new direction. I have to be careful of these. My brain may be looking for ways out as I near completion. It knows.
A task unfinished is not a failure. It is on progress, but once I finish this website project and open it up for peer review, it can be judged. I can be judged. Only then, can it be a failure.
So I tend to not finish things, and I can feel that as I near that stage.
Sometimes I hate being crazy and self aware.