Probably about 8 minutes later. The rush of pride points and pleasure I experience as I write cool ideas with hope instead of … well, whatever that used to be Crushed joy.
“EVerything you crete is art, and perfect
Until the moment you share it, and thet one person sees it.
If you’re me, that instant, all it’s flaws jump out at me, and I feel an inner need to apologize, and run away. To explain the flaws. To point out my failuire.
It’s been a hard personality quirk to stop.
Orange Jeff has a lot less of that problem.
4:00am. I just took what you might call a heroic dose of LSD again. Just like last Sunday morning, and the Sunday before that.
They have almost zero effect on my brain. although they do screw up my poo cycle.
On tonight’s theme, I have a story of the fake acid. Oh, I have two. One is anther Cfaigs list idiot failure. Like EAL idiot.
I get high when thinking about buying drugs and become stupid.
I try not to be stupid enough buying.
I think wisely that I can not be arrested for buying drugs from a copy. Fake or real, but I can be in jail tonight if I sell to a cop.
My coke dealer seems like a cop. In my mind, he now has a moustache and is clean cut and never drives. The white van may have 3 more agents on headphone.
Oh. A reruyn. I don’t like reteklling the same paranoid delusion– sytop.
It’s my thing. My brain scenarious possible outcomes to my actions, and then almost always says no.
Unles somebody is there to ask three times.
Sometimes twice if they have a killer smile.
Smiles are my cryptonight, and here I’ve just said that out loud.
-ZR
The focus of this writing is to say, I took a shitload of acid, which I am in the blief is pretty good.
However… it may be placebo. It may be super weak.
It has happened before. Twice. I am sent fake or weak acid to see if I react and complain, and then good acid is sent. I suppose the theory is cops won’t take acid that noight proibably. They’ll test it with their baggie, and it’s super easy to fool I’ve heard, especially if you …
well, whatever youre planning.
I don’t want my universe to include jail.
Despite my fndness of the colour orange, I don’t want it to be my only choice for days, weeks, years.
I need to be taken care of, but not that way I think.
WNd of prt 2 or whatever.
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