I did it. Not the first time, but since I never really felt any effects from the last of the bad things to try.
It’s a more scientific testing of somw china white powder, a drug which was at the end of my trial list but not really for me. Even if it worked, which seems not to be the case, I don’t need a relax drug so much. I prefer the ones that are more fun for my brain, and the way I think or write. It is a bummer if it has almost zero effect for me though, because I’m at least curious to see what the fuss is al about.
I kind of wanted the whoa. I didn’t even get the meh. I booty bumped a placebo for all I can tell.
Perhaps I could keep it around for others to indulge one day. It might be an interesting thing to use for suicide one day.
I just googled it and apparently heroin overdoses are not horrible painful ways to go, or at least the first google results says. I decided not to cofirm with other articles.
I’m not really on th suicide track these days. I’m doing well, and there was no reason to play with heroin today but the opportunity arose so I took it. Literally.
15 minutes ago with an unknown dosage up my butt. It seems to have done nothing to my mood or body. I don’t know if I could take a nail to my hand without pain currently, but I doubt it.
I didn’t expect more. I’m noticed over my life I have a diffeent reaction to most drugs than the expected norms. I’ve never reacted well to a lot of the pain drugs, especially opiates. I’ve swallowed an 80mg Oxicotton and been uneffected enough to lecture about science to a whole classroom. That didn’t happen, but it could have… or maybe it was a halucination.
I recently figured out that how high I am is less notcable alone. To be truely high as fuck, I kind of need to be interactive. I need to think for others. Alone I can’t judge high because everything is perfect without sharing.
Its close to write or talk to the camera, but when a person is in front of me, I get the whoa.
Tonight… no whoa.
10:37pm
It made me sleepy, I woke up a fair amount. At 9:30 I got up to watch some TV.
high never came, but I was sleepy. Just now I toked a small dab and whoa. Too bad I didn’t try that at 6om.
Oh well.
end f part 2.
Paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart 3.
Once again, my brain cheats me out f the high and dumps the side effects on me, or t the very least, that is my perspective and tje story becomes my reality. I have woken up at lest 6 times over the last 5 hours, but oddly enough, only one hour has passed. I notice a bit of dream and do my sudden awake jolt. 1210am.
I fall back asleep quickly as I never fully wake. I am in that mode of sleep where I’m feeling slothy. Heavy and really that special kind of tired where lifting your head seems a chore.
An hour later, I wake up again to repeat this procss, but the clock has only moved along the time a mere 12 minutes.
This happens several more times and I am continuously shocked at how little advancement has occurred.
By 7am, I’d pretty much been awake the whole morning while simulataniously having long naps in between the minutes. I felt like I was sleeping in some mad scientist black hole time zone where the time between 5:50am and 5:53am was 45 minutes. I sure hope that passes.
I just now noticed this tablet, which I reset to factory defauts is actuyally 12 hours out of sync. My phone says it’s 7:01 am but the tablet is set to 19:01. Hmmmm… I wonder if thats just a coincidence.
End of this story, for now. Wednesday morning. I think.
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