I think there are three ways that people perceive me depending on whether or not they know or think I’m on drugs. At this point in my life the only drug that I am taking regularly is one that has a reputation. Many of the recreational drugs are somewhat accepted by society these days and if you find out that one of your good friends smokes weed you really don’t change your opinion of them that much if at all. 

Everyone has a different line to cross and if they discover their friends are coke users or LSD users they might judge them a little bit but still remain friends. They might even have a curiosity and ask questions. 

If they find out their friends use heroin or meth, they might stop being friends and associating with those people. I have experienced this first hand as people who disassociated with me when discovering I was a meth user. 

They don’t stop to ask questions and they’re not curious. Certain substances make you a drug user or a drug addict and certain substances make you a cool friend. It’s sad, but it seems to be a pretty standard truth. The propaganda against these drugs has worked.

There’s certainly are many people that follow the stereotype and are worthy of dumping as friends. However in the case of methamphetamine and my use, it really is more of a medication than a high. I’m not going to steal your stereos or your catalytic converters and I’m not going to disrupt your party or your life in any way. The main effect I get from this drug is essentially the same as millions of other people get from Adderall legally. It assists in their ADHD or their autism spectrum disorder symptoms and generally makes their life a little better. 

I want deny that I occasionally use more than a minimal dose to get a certain buzz, but for the most part I use it because when I’m on it I get things done and I don’t get it depressed about anotherwise extremely dull and uneventful life. It is literally an improvement on my quality of life and the side effects are minimal. By minimal I mean less than the side effects of virtually any other drug or medication out there. 

I understand that this may change in the future and I may suffer damage to internal organs or my mental capacities but to be honest, I haven’t seen any sign of that in the over 10 years I have been a user. I have had difficulty finding any documentation that was specific or confirmed. It appears to be more propaganda to enhance the scariest of the drug. I understand that it affects people without ADHD differently And there may be actual worst side effects and personality changes that I’m not seeing. 

Unfortunately the global perception is that it is either in the top two or the absolute worst of all the drugs so people run away. 

I find that ironic that it would be perfectly fine for me to be a drunk destroying my liver without a doubt and disrupting social gatherings with rudeness and obnoxious drunken behavior. People would sympathize and try to help or at the least ignore me. In my mind the two accepted drugs, alcohol and cigarettes are quite possibly the worst of all of them. I tend to run away from those people. 

This week I will be without this medication and it will make my life worse, my naps longer and my mood grumpy. Although I am curious to see you what that means to me, I would much rather not have to see how I react. If I react fine and life goes on, will I resume the habit once I have the finance again? I don’t know. Probably. It is a drug after all and one of its prime functions is to make me like it and want it. Logic seldom gets a seat at the table. 

Today is quite possibly the last day although I have been known to stretch it substantially. I’ll blog again tomorrow no doubt. 

End of part one.