Tomorrow I get to go into the city with my sister. We’ll go to the farmers market and then I get the car for two hours while she does pottery and then we come home and I may have manual lumberjack labour to help him with.

So naturally I got spun nicely at 1230am on scraps of meth found in the drug drawer. I didn’t need to but I was having some difficulty falling asleep. I have extended my “out of meth” streak longer than usual thanks in part to being g a slob and part in some found crystals in a go bag I had forgotten about. Also I found a couple of tiny floor shards with my most powerful Temu flashlight 

I used the teeny pipe so a spec still yielded a fair amount and I also did two lines from the bottom of the drawer. Then, for no good reason, I boofed some weak bong water.

It was a good enough spin to enjoy some porn, Tik Tok and Instagram scrolling. I made a few Snapchat pics and then now at 311am I blog before another orgasm.

After that I’ll probably toss and turn in a fruitless attempt to rest, and at 5 or 6 am I’ll give up and repeat. Then at 10am when I’m ready to sleep, I’ll go into the city with my sister 

I think I figured out danger and stupidity are part of the dopamine rush. Pushing myself boosts the high. Risk. I’m surprised I’m just figuring this out at pi time. 3.14am

I wish I had pie. Only one chocolate bar has to last me till I can restock at Walmart tomorrow.

When I’m finally really out, it’s probably not going to last long till I figure out a way to make money and buy more. Maybe that the good thing. It’s the point people turn to crime, but I won’t cross that line… So I might suffer.

I hope I do t go crazy and prove everyone right  meth can’t be long term managed. I want to believe